Beau and I had been chatting about a puppy for quite some time. In fact, we had a plan of adding a little furbaby into our family’s mix once our little baby hit his six month mark (mid June). We thought this would be the perfect time as I’d be adapted enough to mommyhood, the summer would provide perfect puppy weather and I’d still have half my mat leave to do it all (I think we were dreaming). As you know, life threw us a huge curveball so naturally our plans had to change. At first, we concentrated on our grieving and on our time with one another but as our hearts began to build their shields we realized (or at least I did) that I felt a complete void of purpose. My soul was yearning to care for someone so strongly that I was finding it very difficult to be motivated to do anything at all. I could not associate my emotion with an action to make me feel better. Truthfully I was lost and my soul was confused. Now not only was I grieving, I was entering a second stage of the emotional loss of my baby and I had no clue how to tackle it… or so I thought.
I forget how it came about other than already being a plan of ours that we should get a puppy. So we connected with our breeder and planned our next little furbaby’s arrival into our home… stat! All it took was a drive to the Niagara Falls region and we instantly fell in love with an adorably sweet (and teeny) four week old golden brindle boxer. We were the first to visit the litter and had full reign in choosing our special new addition. Three weeks later we made a special trip to visit her (moreso because I thought she was sold to another couple hehe. I’ll post about this later) and then one more week later we were off to pick her up (but not before our furbabymoon which you can read here). Oh the nerves and excitement we felt. We had smiles from ear to ear the entire car ride home; my heart could have burst.
Now here we are at home with our little tiger stripped furbaby Lily who has been my little angel. A little one I’m responsible for, need to take care of, to teach and to smother in cuddles. She gives me a reason to be awake in the dead of night and out of my pjs come morning (jersey material does not fair well in this freezing Canadian weather). It’s been a whole two weeks since she’s been home and every day I happily get to use these bottled up mommy skills that were just spinning me in circles not too long before. Is raising a puppy much easier than a child? Duh! Do I still crave the need to nurture a true baby… of course! But at least I now have that feeling of purpose I couldn’t find before.
PS- I really wish she likes the dog park as much as our Chloe did because that girl almost got me a six pack.
Photography: Castle Avenue Photography